Current location:	The Homestead
Current mood:	calm
Current music:	"Louisiana Stripes" by Hank III

Can We Define "Irony," Kids? DAMN . . . .

Back when I was teaching English I would have to teach the definitions of various literary terms: epiphany, alliteration, allegory, simile, metaphor, and so on. Irony was another one we used to talk about. Irony is a deliberately perverse ordering of events. Such as the time I went dove hunting off and on for a whole season and never even saw a bird. Then, the day after dove season was over I was driving north on 281 through Morgan Mill to get to I-20 to cut over to Weatherford to teach and a dove flies in front of my truck and BLAM!!! I smack right into it and it kicks up over the cab and I look into the rearview mirror and there is a little ball of feathers slowly floating down to the middle of the highway. That's irony!

Or, on Friday, I had another instance of perversely ordered events. It turns out that we all got Xmas bonuses from the school--a little over $500--that morning. (Actually, being the ungrateful wretch I am, I'm like, "I think it's great we got a Thanksgiving bonus . . . but when do I get to pick up my Xmas bonus too?") I should have kept my mouth shut, even internally. That's because Thursday night the power cut on and off in our house and after the appliance guys came out on Friday afternoon it turns out that the compressor in our fridge was dead and so between paying for that information, getting a fridge bought later that afternoon, having it delivered and set up on Saturday, having the old one removed, we were out a little less than $700. I mean, thank dawg, I got a bonus. I'm not griping. But, man, that's IRONY!!!!!!

Anyway, all that aside, today begins a new era in the publishing: the GS (Graphics Specialist) is officially gone (as of Friday). Man, she was there--as an intern and full-time employee--for almost two years, certainly the longest tenure at the office after me. At eight thirty I interview one candidate for her position; at twelve I interview another one by phone. Then, next Monday I interview the third and final candidate. Then, hopefully, one of them can start on December 1st. That would mean the school was pretty much moving at light speed to do something like that but maybe, just maybe, it can actually be done.

I must give all props to the old GS. I was afraid she'd get short timer's disease once she turned her notice in and we wouldn't get any work out of her at all right here at the end of the fall production cycle. I was wrong, so wrong. She actually got more work knocked out in the last week and a half she was here than during any other comparable time period the whole time she was here. Go figure!